Adam Whittington | Effective Parenting Skills — Instill Good Behavior Through Positive Reinforcement

Adam Whittington
5 min readAug 7, 2021

As a parent, how does one discipline your child? have you ever spanked your child? Most behavioral studies show that there are three approaches parents use to evoke desired behavior from their children. They are positive or negative reinforcement and punishment.

According to Adam Whittington, Positive reinforcement occurs after you offer a gift or praise which will increase the likelihood that your child will repeat the desired behavior.

Negative reinforcement occurs once you elicit a behavior by confiscating or avoiding an adverse event, like having your child head to school earlier to avoid traffic he dislikes riding in. Punishment is that the third form of approach.

Although often confused with negative reinforcement, it involves the inclusion of an adverse event to decrease or stop what you perceive to be a negative behavior, like administering a spanking or timeout to prevent your son from picking on your daughter.

Child experts generally agree that positive reinforcement is that the most desirable of the three methods wont to elicit positive behavior from children and reduce negative behavior.

Positive Reinforcement as Compared to Bribery?

Some parents mistakenly equate positive reinforcement and bribery. With bribery, you promise some type of material reward in exchange for behavior you would like.

This often involves negotiating or maybe begging your child to behave properly. this can be different than giving your child verbal praise or encouragement, or rewarding them with some small token after they need to achieve a specific goal said, Adam Whittington.

Many times, parents steer clear from positive reinforcement because they think this might spoil their child. However, this can be not in the slightest degree true if the reward is given in response to positive behavior or a goal well attained by the kid.

Additionally, these styles of rewards don’t have to be the least bit expensive. Especially for tiny children, small tokens like stickers provide a tangible reward for a few long-sought-after goals, like potty training.

Young children especially have a far easier time with difficulty getting goals if they’re given regular rewards along the way. additionally, nonmaterial rewards like hugs, praise, or genuine parental excitement for employment well done also are highly prized by the kid.

When do you have to Start Using Positive Reinforcement?

There is no correct time within which to start out using positive reinforcement, but children learn to equate receipt of some sort of reinforcement to their positive behavior after they need had several similar experiences.

Certain good deeds that are reinforced at an early age become a habit after a particular period of your time.

As children develop, their needs will grow and expand, as will your expectations. Therefore, the reinforcement may change, but the final principle of positive reinforcement remains identical.

Positive reinforcement’s success depends not just on the kid, but on the adult who uses a specific method as his or her disciplinary approach.

If used successfully, positive reinforcement can help a baby develop intrinsic motivation. This, of course, is that the ultimate goal. Children learn to expect certain results from certain behavior.

How does one Best Use Positive Reinforcement?

The best thanks to using positive reinforcement are to try to do the following:

First, select and define the behavior you would like to strengthen. for example, you’ll be able to be clear about what you accept in your children’s behavior reception.

To best reinforce positive behavior, ensure that you simply clearly define what your children’s progress should be by specifically defining the behavior you would like your children to repeat. don’t give abstract directives like, “Behave yourself once you are eating.”

To provide clear, concise directions on “how” children should behave themselves, such as, “Sit still on your chair together with your napkin in your lap, don’t fidget or play together with your food, and after you are finished, ask to be excused before you permit the table.”

Second, choose what styles of reinforcement you wish to use. Reinforcements should be age-appropriate and maybe something the kid can understand and wish.

Since children have individual preferences, reinforcements should match children’s characteristics. They must be age-appropriate enough that the kid can earn them quite easily to not get discouraged.

However, they ought to be difficult enough to earn that the kid does should make an honest effort to behave to receive them. For instance, stickers are very appropriate for preschool children, since they value these, while an extended weekend curfew is more appropriate to a youngster.

Third, consistency is that the key; reinforcement should be provided without fail and with clear rules and expectations. Children should expect routine and will expect consequences for bad behavior, additionally as rewards permanently behavior.

When a selected behavior is simply being learned, immediate reinforcement is incredibly important, so children can expect clear feedback. Because the behavior becomes more integrated, intermittent reinforcement is truly better, since this has been shown to strengthen the behavior instead of weakening it.

Oftentimes, if children are rewarded for behavior consistently, they cease to perform that behavior unless they receive the reward. Therefore, intermittent and irregular reinforcement is best once a behavior has been learned. Once the behavior is fully established as a habit, you’ll be able to remove the tangible reinforcement altogether.

Fourth, praise and encouragement as you reinforce. This helps motivate the kid to continue; while praise is often good, use caution to not overpraise.

This may be counterproductive because the child learns to concentrate on an external authority instead of on his or her internal sense of right and wrong.

Encouragement, too, is beneficial if used when a baby becomes discouraged, but again, the main target here is to develop a way of control within the kid.

You can best praise children by specializing in nice behavior. as an example, saying, “That was very nice of you to assist that lady to carry her bag,” helps the kid understand that his efforts truly impact people in an exceedingly positive manner.

Thus, not only does one acknowledge the children’s actions, but you show how they affect others. This helps the kid to start out focusing outside of himself on how actions have an impact, additionally to how his actions affect just himself or his immediate family, like siblings.

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Adam Whittington
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Adam Whittington runs a charity for children rescue. He mainly helps children who suffer from some problems in Australia.